So It Has Come to This, Again

#2 came swiftly back into my life in 2010.  All it took was a single text.  We dated briefly in 1998, had a falling out, and reconnected on Facebook in 2009.  It had been 12 years since we dated.  He got under my skin as quickly as he did the first time. 

I must have written fifteen poems about him in the aftermath.  He left, and I didn't understand what I did wrong.  It tormented me.  All the unanswered questions of being left.  I loved him and it hurt so bad.  I remember laying in the floor listing to "Pretty Hate Machine" on repeat.  It took so long to get over him.

Before
You couldn't wait to leave,
to leave me.
You walked away cold
with electrifying pace.
I stood in awe of your speed
as I  swept my tears
from the floor you tread on.
I thought you were a believer
when I told you
these hidden truths of me.
And your words had meaning
before
You couldn't wait to leave,
to leave me.
-1998, I was 21 years old.

I saw a meme a year or so ago.  Having married him at this point, I thought it was wrong.  But then saved it to my phone anyway.